The Body Remembers: Healing Trauma, PTSD & Self-Love | Dr. Noushin Hart

What happens when the doctor helping everyone else is quietly struggling to survive?

For more than 30 years, Dr. Noushin Hart built a successful career as a board-certified radiation oncologist while privately battling the effects of childhood trauma, PTSD, depression, insomnia, and emotional pain that conventional treatments never fully resolved.

In this powerful conversation, Dr. Hart shares her journey from silence and survival to healing and self-love. Together, we explore the connection between trauma, the nervous system, physical health, and the importance of reconnecting with ourselves.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Childhood trauma and emotional healing
• PTSD, depression, and insomnia
• Why the body remembers what the mind tries to forget
• Quiet depletion and nervous system overload
• Surviving versus healing
• Reconnecting with intuition and self-trust
• The power of hope and resilience
• Why your past does not define you

CONNECT WITH DR. NOUSHIN HART

🌐 https://healingbyhart.com

🌐 https://h2hcc.com

📸 @dr.hart2heart

From Silence to Self-Love: A Journey of Survival and Resilience 

(Coming Soon)

Remember: Healing is not about becoming someone new. It's about reconnecting with who you have always been.

Transcript

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A Healer Who Is Hurting

SPEAKER_00 0:00

What happens when the person helping everyone else is the one quietly struggling to survive? Today's guest spent more than three decades caring for patients as a board-certified radiation oncologist. She dedicated her life to helping others navigate some of their most frightening illnesses. Yet behind the credentials, the white coat, and the professional success was a woman carrying the weight of childhood trauma, depression, PTSD, insomnia, and years of unanswered questions. Today we're talking about healing. Not just healing from illness, and not just healing from trauma, but healing from the experiences that shape us, the stories we carry, and the journey from survival to self-love. Welcome back to Delay the Binge, the podcast where we explore the patterns that quietly shape our lives, the moments that wake us up, and the pauses that help us choose a different path forward. I'm your host, Pam Dwyer. My guest today is Dr. Nusheen Hart. Dr. Hart is a board-certified radiation oncologist whose work bridges conventional medicine with trauma-informed, holistic, and preventative approaches to health and well-being. After more than 30 years caring for patients, she began asking deeper questions about the connection between emotional health, nervous system regulation, resilience, and physical wellness. She is also the author of a memoir titled From Silence to Self-Love: A Journey of Survival and Resilience. Dr. Hart, it is truly an honor to have you here. Welcome.

SPEAKER_01 1:47

Thank you so very much. Thank you for having me. And thank you for that beautiful introduction.

SPEAKER_00 1:52

I enjoyed it. Well, you're so worthy of it. My goodness. I just kept reading and reading about you, and I thought, wow,

Energy Work That Saved Her Life

SPEAKER_00 2:00

she's done so much. Thank you. I appreciate it. Yes. So before we dive in today, I'd love for our listeners to meet the woman behind the physician. So where are you joining us from today?

SPEAKER_01 2:12

I'm calling uh from Houston, Texas, where I have been residing uh since 2003. Uh except for a couple of years that I went to Virginia and Florida and came right back to Houston. I love Houston.

SPEAKER_00 2:28

Oh my gosh, we're neighbors. I live in San Antonio. Are you? Wow, we gotta meet. What fills up your heart outside of your professional work? What do you do on a personal level?

SPEAKER_01 2:40

I have started doing energy work in the form of a Kundalini activation process and make anything possible. These are the two modalities that, without any exaggeration, saved my life. Wow. And when I discovered them, I thought uh I I felt a responsibility to introduce it to other people because I had no idea such modalities existed. And after failing 30 years of therapy and heavy doses of medication, I'm like, what? People don't know anything about this. And I truly enjoy doing this for other people.

SPEAKER_00 3:18

Oh my goodness, because it makes such a huge difference in their lives. Absolutely, absolutely. And quick.

SPEAKER_01 3:25

Yes. I spent 30 years of uh my time in therapy and medication and all of that. Uh and that meant 30 years of insomnia and 30 years of depression. And um, I don't want anybody to spend three decades of their life trying to figure out how to how to feel better. And the modalities are quick and efficient and effective.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

Oh it's exciting to know. I've searched for I don't think it was 30 years, but I've had so many issues. No, and that's why I'm excited about talking with you today, because a lot of times doctors are like, your labs are perfect. We don't know what's wrong with you.

SPEAKER_01 4:03

Receive. They're two kinds of news. I have never seen this before.

SPEAKER_00 4:07

I was like, oh my God, I'm the first one. I know. I wish there was a doctor that knew how to help me. And where were you? You were you should have been right there in front of me.

SPEAKER_01 4:20

Well, I was struggling with my own problems and with my own doctors.

SPEAKER_00 4:26

Oh my gosh. Well, first I just want to talk about the book because I'm an author too, and I'm excited to learn now. Has it has it published yet already? I'm looking for a publisher. If you know one, let me know. Oh my goodness, I know the best publisher in the world. Oh, perfect. Perfect. I can share that with you later if you want. And she's incredible. She actually has a podcast and it's called Finish the Damn

Breaking Silence About Childhood Abuse

SPEAKER_00 4:50

Book. I did that. From silence to self-love. That's I love that title so much. What was the silence all about?

SPEAKER_01 4:59

Silence is uh, you know, I was uh among all other forms of abuse, um, I was sexually abused um uh beginning age four. And in all cultures, and also I'm from Iran, in Iranian culture, you're not supposed to talk about it, right? So the first thing that abuser does, it teaches you, threatens you that you don't talk about it. And when you grow up, uh I was 34 years old. Uh the first year in the United States, um, when I uh in response to a questionnaire that a psychiatrist put in front of me and asked whether you have been ever sexually abused, I said yes. That was the first time at the age 34. Oh wow, if yeah, and if I was in Iran, nobody would ask me that question. So um there is no healing without acknowledging what has happened to you. So um that silence was lasted 30 years because my sexual abuse started at age four. So for 30 years, I did not talk about it with anybody. Oh my gosh, how did you keep that bottled up inside of you? By suppressing it. Uh when I started talking with my psychiatrist, that the first person that I admitted this had happened to me, uh, she started asking me to describe it. And I was describing it emotion. Like I was talking about it as if this had happened to somebody else. And when she told me you at least need seven years of therapy, I almost fell off my chair. I said, seven years of therapy? I'm perfectly fine. I don't need therapy. Uh, you see, I can talk about it and I don't have any feeling about it. And she said, That's exactly the problem. You have suppressed all of your emotions, and I'm sure you have suppressed a lot of memories as well. And she was right. When I started therapy, I started getting worse.

SPEAKER_02 7:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:06

Because all the suppressed memories and suppressed emotions came up.

SPEAKER_00 7:11

I've been to 10 years of counseling, and every time I get a new therapist, they would always tell me, Pam, it gets a lot worse before it gets better.

SPEAKER_01 7:20

And the new therapist, yeah. I was like, I was doing my um internship in Philadelphia, then I went to St. Louis from my residency, my first job in Chicago, then I I was moving a l uh all around, and every time I had a new therapist, I had to start all over again. And yeah, uh even though I think therapy has some place somewhere, but retelling these stories are re-traumatizing.

SPEAKER_00 7:47

Oh, even to write a memoir, right? I wrote a memoir, so I I had to open up all those wounds again that I felt I had put behind me. But then there's this one therapist that said something that really made sense to me. Pam, it will never go away. You can never bury it again. But I can teach you coping skills, how to cope with the emotions and the patterns and the behaviors that are caused from that trauma. And no one had ever really explained that to me. I always thought they would just make it go away.

SPEAKER_01 8:18

When I um when 30 years of therapy didn't uh really resolve anything, uh, and I I learned about map, um, map is make anything possible is amazing. Uh six sessions of map really neutralized uh my traumas. And I thought that was done, right? So when I decided to write my uh memoir, I thought, you know, now I'm fine. I can just write about it, talk about it. And I didn't I didn't put pen on paper, I would dictate it. I talking for m I I basically spoke my book rather than writing it. And it was so difficult. Like I would just speak like one chapter, and then I needed weeks to recover from that chapter that I had dictated, and then I would recover and go to another chapter, and it turned out that uh writing that memoir was so therapeutic because in between chapters I would use the tools that now I had to basically yeah, deal with my emotions. So that was very therapeutic.

SPEAKER_00 9:32

You are talking my language because sometimes people are like, Oh, I don't like to read memoirs. But I think you have to read it with knowing that the author was so courageous. I actually put my raw journal notes every few chapters, sharing my true emotions, and then the following chapters support the entry. But it's hard reliving that. But if you don't, you're right, you will not heal, and it is very therapeutic eventually.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

Yes, you know, every uh there's no other way of uh dealing with emotions other than opening the can of worm. You know, we always said don't open the can of worm. No, you gotta open it. There's no other way.

SPEAKER_00 10:18

Mm-hmm. My mantra is your past doesn't define you, it prepares you. And teaching people how to use pain for purpose because it doesn't go away, why don't we use it like fuel to do things, to move forward? And was there a surviving, just surviving is no longer it no longer works because that's what we've learned how to survive, right? Right. And so when it stops working for you, when was there a moment when you realized survival was no longer enough for you?

SPEAKER_01 10:54

Quite honestly,

When Therapy Brings Memories Back

SPEAKER_01 10:55

about six years ago, um I just to survive was the highest goal because I got to a point that I was like at this crossroad that okay, I either had to end it or I had to survive. And the only reason that I decided to survive was my parents and my daughter because I learned that I could end it and end my own pain, but then I would carry all of that, I would just drop all that pain on my parents and my child. Like that is really cowardly and very selfish. So I have to find a way to survive. So I don't want to minimize surviving. Surviving was huge for me. However, uh you are correct, surviving should not be the end goal. And the wisdom that I have achieved through all this pain, uh, I think that's what we need. Uh, and then sharing it with other people who are in pain, who are in the same situation you were, and then serving those people with what you have learned coming through that path, very difficult path. That is what makes me very happy.

SPEAKER_00 12:16

Yes, me too. It's very healing just to help one person. If they can see themselves in your story, it helps them to relate and then hopefully you can have a conversation with them. But I was in the same boat, I was considering taking my life as well, but I had a child, I had a son who was the very reason

Surviving Versus Healing Over Time

SPEAKER_00 12:35

I couldn't do it.

SPEAKER_01 12:36

Right, right. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:38

And so I think I think the powers that be place certain vessels in our lives that keep us around.

SPEAKER_01 12:45

Yes, exactly, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

I think many people understand survival, but healing can feel much harder to define. What's the difference between surviving and healing?

SPEAKER_01 12:59

I want to a little bit expand on survival. Okay. Uh, when we are traumatized, we go into survival mode, meaning that we're constantly in the fight or flight mode, which we like adrenal glands are constantly secreting cortisol. Oh, I'm so sorry. It's okay. So um that um obviously not only is a very stressful way of living, but also it's very destructive for the body, and that's how we get sick. However, when you finally survive, you achieve that like I finally got to a point it's like no, I can live now. So you gradually come out of survival mode and you gradually heal. So healing, I and I emphasize I ING because you never get to ED healed. That's a process that you go through your entire life until the last day of your life. And that is good because it's like a layers of onion. You go layer after layer, and that's a part of your spiritual growth and a spiritual journey. Yes. However, for me, definition of healing is reconnecting to your intuition and reconnecting to your body. Because as a result of trauma, we disconnect from both of those. We because our traumas are stored in our bodies, we completely through the process of dissociation, like when we are sexually abused, we detach from our body, we dissociate because the pain of it is intolerable for a child. Yes. So we dissociate, we detach, and we remain detached from our bodies. And then uh that inner voice, uh, intuition, higher self, we disconnect from that. And then we become so much reliant on outer sources to tell us how to live, what to do, how to be. We lose our authentic self, our authentic voice. And it is only through healing that we find our authentic self. We become our authentic self, and we follow our own intuition and we follow our own body. And our bodies know exactly what we need, whether it's food or supplement or how much sleep, how much exercise. We don't need anybody to tell us what to eat or whatever. We can only uh follow our body, and our bodies exactly know the same thing with any decision in our in make we make in our lives. Our intuition is our best guide.

Reconnecting To Body And Intuition

SPEAKER_00 15:50

So my point on that is the unresolved trauma effect, it's become hang on to it. I we talk a lot about what I I refer to as quiet depletion, and that is when people look fine on the outside, we're functioning, we're excelling, we're thriving. Yes, have every reason to be happy and joyful. Right. But on the inside, we're emotionally exhausted and depleted, and so what over time it does affect our health, our physical health, if we do not begin to figure out why we are ignoring our own needs and not listening to our well-oiled machine of a body. Right. So I totally agree with that. Our bodies will tell us, but sometimes, even though it's the unhealthy behaviors that we study a lot and patterns, and people like let's just say it's sugar, right? And maybe I I shouldn't eat it. But if I've had a stressful day when I'm angry or emotional of any type, right, you crave it. I crave it. It's a dopamine hit that I need

Quiet Depletion And Dopamine Loops

SPEAKER_00 16:55

because I'm so exhausted and depleted. And also I know it's not good for me, but I still do it. That's the big question. Why do we do it even though our body is screaming at us not to?

SPEAKER_01 17:07

Well, it's proven, science, that like for example, I had insomnia. I literally could not sleep. And when you don't get enough sleep, you lose your will. And when you use your will, you cannot control yourself. So you end up in the pantry eating all the candies in the pantry. But if you had eight hours of sleep and you're rested, you can completely resist that. So it's a vicious cycle, you know? You you don't get enough um rest. Uh you you lose your will and you fall for things that are bad for you. And you take the things that are bad for you, that uh becomes a vicious cycle. It affects your sleep, affects your health, it becomes a vicious cycle.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

Right. And over time, there will be some bad labs that our doctors find. It does start taking a toll. And we talk about the power of the brain, the neuroscience of everything, and just taking a pause, right? Take pausing for one moment before you act on whatever the unhealthy urge is, uh, can really be the difference, make all the difference in the world.

SPEAKER_01 18:19

You know, I remember the days that uh just like this you described, I was in my early 40s, I had a young child. I out from outside, I had a very successful career. So I'm running between my clinic and between a young child and a gazillion patients and clinics, run, run, run, run. And then I had insomnia, I couldn't sleep. So exhausted all the time, but as a professional, every time I enter a patient's room, I put this huge smile on my face, right? I know that you have to be, and then you have to just uh be there for your patient, and everybody thinks, oh wow, like look at her life, you know, she has everything, and and you're like inside, you're just exploding, and there's there's no place to be still and rest and pause because uh especially as a woman, right? So you're working in clinic, giving all you have, and the moment you enter home, you release the nanny, and then you have to give all to your child, and this is this is 365 days a year.

SPEAKER_00 19:36

Right, there's no break at all. We perform in the manner we bring on ourselves and society, quite frankly. There are expectations placed on us when we're very young, and it stays with us. And then we forget to look in, and then before you don't feel anything anymore. You're just numb.

SPEAKER_01 19:58

As Dr. Gabor Mate, one of his uh many wonderful books, uh, When the Body Says No, all that time the body says, I'm really tired, I really can't do it, please rest, and you just can't. And then when you get sick, you just you're better than just the body says, nope, nope, I can't do it.

SPEAKER_00 20:21

Gotta gotta stay in bed. It's happened to me so many times where I literally almost died. Oh because I just ignored it. Like an ulcer. It's something it sounds simple, but if you don't know it's bleeding out. Right. And I'll tell you, you're a doctor, you know this. I fainted, and they took me to the ER, and they're like, wow, your hemoglobin's out of four. It was at a four. How could you walk? I don't know how I was walking. Yes. Anyway, they fixed it, they cauterized it, and it's fine now, but I just didn't know. I didn't pay any attention to the signs. Yeah. There were signs. Uh-huh. But that's what we do when we're quietly depleted. And it says it affects over 70% of women quiet depletion. And that's because we're just perfectionists, and we are going to get it all done to the best of our ability. So much judgment out there.

SPEAKER_01 21:17

They're going to look at us as oh, just always nagging. What are you nagging about? You know, that your life is a good idea. That's why we snap.

SPEAKER_00 21:26

That's why we snap and scream and yell. Exactly. The brain is like, I need some dopamine, go argue with your spouse.

SPEAKER_01 21:32

Right.

SPEAKER_00 21:34

Go give them a hard time. But yeah, it's if you it being aware, being curious and finding out why am I doing this? Looking good looking on the outside, looking in, and then you can begin to rebuild and become the person you always were. It's beautiful if if we can just work on it in small little steps each day instead of adding it like a big to do. Who would Dr. Hart be today if healing had never happened?

SPEAKER_01 22:01

It was literally dead. Yes. I mean, I there was I mean five, six years ago though I I just couldn't go any further.

Body Whispers Before It Screams

SPEAKER_01 22:10

I mean, I was like I was not sleeping at all. I had this panic attacks that I couldn't just breathe. I mean, it was so bad. It was so bad that you know how panic attacks they feel like you're having a heart attack. It was so, so very bad that I just couldn't go on. I just could not go on. It was it it had reached a point that it was impossible to pretend.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

I love that you say the body whispers before it screams. And that's the first stage. I have four stages of quiet depletion, and the first stage is the whisper. We talk about so can you give us some some signs of uh that would give you a heads up that your your body is trying to tell you something? I mean, what are some signs?

SPEAKER_01 23:03

It could be a very mild fatigue, right? Yeah, you just you're just tired. Uh you just don't want to come out of bed in the morning, or you feel you have to go to bed early, but we don't listen. We push. Like, oh no, there's no way I can go to bed at eight. I have these five more things to do. And we just push and push, and in the morning, no, I have to jump out. And you just ignore day after day after day, and then fatigue becomes mild, fatigue becomes more becomes pain. Then you start having pain in your body. And then you're like, oh, it must be my muscle. You just we kind of dismiss it. So it must be maybe I stretch my muscles. This your body just becomes louder and louder, and we keep just ignoring and ignoring. And it gets to a point that you just can't move anymore.

SPEAKER_00 23:58

And it does start impacting you, and everyone's truly unique. You know, and it's just like that ulcer of mine. I I had no clue, but I had all once I realized it, you know, and went to the ER, uh-huh, I knew. I'm like, oh, and now I see all the signs that were happening. Right, right. Why didn't I pay attention?

SPEAKER_01 24:17

And it's like the the the very first sign of anemia is fatigue. I'm sure you were very fatigued. Oh my gosh, but you just kept pushing yourself.

SPEAKER_00 24:27

Well, what's crazy, right, is that I went to the doctor saying how tired I was. I'm like, I have lots to do. I can't afford to be this tired. Is there like a pill?

SPEAKER_01 24:37

Yes, they put you ontidepressants because they often think that fatigue is a sign of depression and you're a woman, you must be depressed, and it just gives you a pill for depression.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

Oh, it's so it just just be curious, everyone. I can't tell you that that it and don't believe it when they say nothing's wrong with you. You know your

Owning Your Care In A Rushed System

SPEAKER_00 25:00

exactly.

SPEAKER_01 25:00

Yeah, I mean I I constantly tell patients you are in charge of your own health. Do not ever think that your doctor is in charge. You are in charge. They're just a consultant. And especially these days with AI, you have no excuse of not s doing the research yourself. Put your symptoms in AI, and I'm not saying they have all the answers, but you can get a whole lot of information about your symptoms just by searching in AI. Yeah. What could it be? At least get the possibilities.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

Yes, exactly. And one there was one doctor who says, do not go on Google. It's just gonna scare you, and and usually it's not anything what it's telling you. That's that's true, but uh you just I am a physician and I cannot rely on my doctors.

SPEAKER_01 25:53

I know you know we physicians are infamous for being bad patients, and there's some truth to that. However, if I blindly follow what my doctors tell me to do, there there's gonna be a disaster. So I'm always questioning and saying, no, we shouldn't do that. What about this? What about that? And you know, I'm a doctor, and to some degree they may respect or even be defensive that you know, oh my god, if I don't listen to her, if something goes wrong, she's gonna sue me or something. I cannot imagine a regular person who doesn't have M D or R N after her name, how they they listen, I don't think they listen to them.

SPEAKER_00 26:44

No. And it's just ignorance, and it's not to be mean, but it's just that they're not curious, they're not going the extra mile to to question even the experts. Like it's this the system.

SPEAKER_01 26:56

The problem is the system. Like uh my doctors for a follow-up, they have only 15 minutes to see me. That is nothing. 15 minutes is high by. And as I enter the room, first of all, my doctors never examine me. Never. Secondly, as I'm talking to them, they are facing their computer, they're typing, they don't even look at me. Um and then if it's once a year annual exam that pr they perhaps they have 30 minutes or at most like 40 minutes, they examine me. I mean, I had on New Year's Eve of not 2026, uh 2025, I developed vertigo out of Nova and I thought I am having a stroke. So I went to the emergency room. Nobody in the emergency room examined me. They just did the CT scan and um they sent me home after three or four hours with a bill for sixteen thousand dollars. Yes, which um about I would say three to four thousand dollars of it was mine, the rest of it my insurance paid. And I just was so surprised, and I just sent letter after letter to the hospital, I was like, nobody even examined me. All you did is just CT scan, and it's just unbelievable. And I think um the system part of it is goes back to medical uh school. Like when I graduated from medical school, which I date myself, this is 1987, there was no such a thing as ultrasound, there was no MRI, there was no CT scan, there was no PET scan. So we had to completely rely on our skill of physical examination. We had to rely on our five senses. We could sometimes make a diagnosis based on how the patient smelled, and we spent a lot of time examining a patient from head to toe. And uh the more technology has advanced, which is no no problem, I'm not against the technology, but it has completely replaced the art of physical examination. Oh you just say, hi, my head is hurting. Oh, okay, let's get a CT of a head.

SPEAKER_00 29:44

Right. And there's a specialist with the blinders on. You have the body as a whole, correct?

SPEAKER_01 29:50

Right. So when I I went to medical school in Iran, and in Iran,

Trauma As A Response Not Event

SPEAKER_01 29:55

when you graduate from medical school, you are a family practitioner. So I practiced as a family practitioner for seven years. So during those seven years of practicing right out of medical school, I got to know human beings at the whole body, and I was practicing in a small village. When there was no emergency room, no hospital, I had to address all the urgent needs of people in that village. So I was really, I was pushed to do way more than I was trained to do. However, here in the United States, when medical students graduate, they can't touch a patient. They have to immediately choose a residency program. And when they choose a residency program, they never get a chance to get to know a patient as a whole. So they either know you your eyes or your throat or your, I don't know, your bladder. And when when you go see each one of these, they don't really care about the rest of your body. So none other than family practitioner, the rest of them are just focusing on one part of your body.

SPEAKER_00 31:18

I remember I had an eye doctor where I'd go get my eyes checked once a year. He used to be able to tell all kinds of things that happened to me just by looking in my eyes. Have you been sick asking me questions? Yes, how do you know? You can see it all. The eye tells all.

SPEAKER_01 31:33

That's beautiful. Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's beautiful.

SPEAKER_00 31:35

That's the only time that's ever happened for me. But do you find that people don't understand the word trauma? How would you define if someone says, What do you mean trauma? How would you explain that to them?

SPEAKER_01 31:46

I think these days that talking about trauma has become a trend, I think it's being overused and misunderstood. Yes, so these days uh people think that trauma means something that happened to you. And that's not trauma. Trauma means the response, the way you have responded to something that happened to you. So two people might have been sitting in the same car when they have a car accident, and one of them, regardless of how much injury they had, one of them recovers from this uh car accident emotionally, and they can drive in a car with absolute no problem, and go sit in another car without absolute no problem, and the other one cannot get near a car. They develop this phobia of car, they can never drive, they cannot. So the person who now has fear of car and cannot drive, that's the traumatized person. The person who went through the accident and now it's fine, that person is not traumatized. So the trauma was not the car accident, the trauma was how the person responded to it. And when it comes to childhood trauma, one of the most important factors is whether there was somebody, say, you know, say uh a child was being abused by their parents, for example. Was there a teacher? Was there an aunt? Was there an uncle who witnessed and supported and listened to the child, uh validated their feeling, intervened, witnessed, that person can make a difference between that child being traumatized and not traumatized. So the trauma happens in children who have nobody to validate what they're going through, support them, help them go through it. And um so I think that distinction is very important when we talk about trauma.

SPEAKER_00 34:14

Yes,

Rewiring Patterns With MAP And CAP

SPEAKER_00 34:15

I agree wholeheartedly because sometimes I can delay the binge, we notice what coping behaviors are. It's usually overworking, people pleasing, perfectionism, emotional eating, staying busy. And those are usually attempts to soothe the nervous system that never learned that it was safe, is what I'm realizing. But I for myself did not even recognize that because I I weighed 300 pounds at one time. You know, now I weigh 140, but you know, I had to take a lot of drastic steps for tools, right? But and it helped me lose some of the weight, but I couldn't keep it off because I never addressed what the real issue was. Right.

SPEAKER_01 34:57

And the the problem is that these are very subconscious, unconscious coping mechanisms. You're not aware of it. And even when you become aware of it, to reverse them or to control them needs addressing them at subconscious level. So the beauty of map or make anything possible is that we address issues at subconscious level. Somebody was asking me, what is the difference between affirmation and map? And I told them the difference is that affirmation you're working at conscious level. And they're asking me specifically about the book and the movie Secret, and The Secret and Manifestation. Um, and I was like, okay, so why do you think it is that millions of people have watched the movie The Secret and have read the book The Secret, and they're not billionaires, they all want to manifest money. Yes. The reason is that they say, Oh, I am rich, I am rich, I am rich. That's their affirmation. And the subconscious mind behind, like, no, you're not. No, you're not. You're very poor, you're not rich. Because there's this resistance, and the subconscious mind is controlling their mind, not the affirmation they're trying to pose on themselves. Now, with map, not only can we neutralize the negative emotions and negative um beliefs, but also we can replace them with positive beliefs and positive emotions. And because it is done at subconscious level and we remove the resistance towards it, then it is working, it is effective uh because there's no resistance towards it.

SPEAKER_00 36:51

Wow, and it's so much it's so similar to how the brain loves patterns. We always try to teach our clients that we need to realize what the unhealthy pattern is, but we need to replace it with a new behavior because the brain wants the patterns, correct?

SPEAKER_01 37:10

So the patterns are coming from wiring of the brain. So somebody who's traumatized, their brains get wired a certain way. And I usually use the analogy of GPS. Say, you know, you you you go into GPS of your car and you use certain preferences. For example, say avoid toll roads or avoid highways or the opposite. So when you get in your car and you put the destination, your GPS is gonna follow your preferences and always either send you through toll roads or avoid toll roads. That is a pattern. Okay? Okay. Now, if you want to change that pattern, you have to change the preferences. So with map, the brain is rewired. So is with plant medicine. The reason that psychedelics are so uh effective is that they also rewire the brain. So when the brain is rewired, an old pattern is replaced by a new pattern.

unknown 38:21

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 38:22

It's so and map is my name backwards.

SPEAKER_01 38:24

I don't know if you realize that, but oh interesting.

SPEAKER_00 38:28

There's a pattern right there. I'm very interested in map, and and I didn't realize you were so close, so maybe.

SPEAKER_01 38:38

I do both map and cap uh online, so you don't need to be in Houston to do map.

SPEAKER_00 38:46

Really? I hope everyone's listening because we can all benefit from this.

SPEAKER_01 38:51

Oh, absolutely. Her name is Colette uh Stryker. She lives in Houston, she's like less than half an hour from me. But sh when I did six sessions of map with her, we did it online. We didn't do it in person.

SPEAKER_00 39:04

How interesting. A lot of people are seeking online treatment for many things.

SPEAKER_01 39:09

Yeah, I mean, you do it in the privacy of your home. There's no need to be in person.

SPEAKER_00 39:13

I mean, it's not online.

unknown 39:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:16

Well, how has your understanding of healing evolved over

Hope Identity And Rewriting Your Story

SPEAKER_00 39:20

the years? And through map? Have you always known about it or how did you learn about it?

SPEAKER_01 39:26

Uh, through personal experience, I used to be this very indecisive person who, when I wanted to make any decision, I had to write a table, pros and cons, and see which one, which column is outweighing the other. And then at the end of the day, I had to consult 10 people. I am not really sure what to do, what do you think? And they would say, do this, do that. And what was good for them was not good for me. And when through CAP and map, uh I neutral, I mean my traumas were neutralized, very naturally I lost the need to consult other people. And I intuitively knew the answer to my questions. And then I noticed, oh wow, I can make decisions on my own. And um the the difference between your mind telling you this is the answer, or your intuition telling you this is the answer, is that with intuition, there's a knowing that you don't even know why you're so sure. And you're sure there's no worry or doubt around it. You just know for sure that I have to make a right here, and then you make a right. Um, so uh I knew that something is different about me. And then about my body, you know, like anybody else, I was like following certain diet. You know, one day they said this is good for you, and the other day, do you remember about butter versus margarine? Like every two years that was a new study. That butter is really good for you, and then two years okay, no, no, no, no, butter is really bad, you should eat margarine. I know. And they could never make a decision. It was like, which one is it, right? So, but then I my body, I was just listening to my body, it was like my body was very specific. My body wanted this, and it was very different from craving. Like, my body wanted this, and I would give it to it. And then and and that liberation of outside sources to tell me what to do and how to be and how to decide, that that was to me that defined healing for me.

SPEAKER_00 41:58

You talk a lot about hope, saying that hope is such an important part of healing. Oh, absolutely, absolutely, absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 42:06

I um you know how they say that, you know, the light at the end of the tunnel, the light at the end of the tunnel. And that's really good, but at some point I think we have to be that light for ourselves. Uh it's hard when you're really, really at a dark place. And at when you're at really, really dark place, yes, somebody telling you, look, I know you don't see that light right now, but I'm telling you, I have been through this, just look at me. Let me be the light, that light at the end of your tunnel. But once you start seeing this flickering light, even though it might be really, really small, you have to really just become that light yourself and become hopeful and uh positive. And uh maybe there a little bit of affirmation would be helpful.

SPEAKER_00 43:13

Well, definitely. And and I always give a visual, I mean, a lot of people they get super depressed, they say it's like going into a dark well, and you know, and they can't climb out. And so I just always tell them, then you need to look up because the light the sky is up there, no matter how far into the well you are.

SPEAKER_01 43:31

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 43:32

Keep your eye on the sky.

SPEAKER_01 43:35

Yes, yes, yes. I just recently, you know, from I'm from Iran, and there has been uh almost three months of war and like a lot of worrisome stuff. And my uncle was he lives in Toronto and was telling me that he's getting depressed. And I'm like, listen, as somebody who has been in treatment resistant depression, I'm telling you, if you let Let yourself go, you're gonna be at the bottom of that dark wall. You need to grab yourself from the back of your neck and pull yourself out, even if it's just one small step a day. Yep, that is what you need to do. Oh my gosh. Otherwise, it just it just swallows you. It just it's like a black hole. I call it black hole. It just swallows you.

SPEAKER_00 44:27

It does, and it's so overwhelming when you are in there in the pit. So do you think people wait too long to give themselves permission to heal?

SPEAKER_01 44:39

I think they don't know they can heal. There was a time that, and that's a lot of it comes from outside sources. I I really believed that I was damaged good, and there was absolutely no way I could get any better. Like I remember the day that my psychiatrist sat in front of me and said, I do not have anything else to offer you. What does that mean? Right? Like that means that you're just hopeless. You're just you're not you're not gonna get better. I don't have anything to give you. So that gave me this impression that I am just damaged good. I would never be able to get better, and that becomes a negative belief.

SPEAKER_00 45:28

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 45:28

So I think a lot of people have that negative belief that they are not there's no hope for them, they're not gonna be able to get better. And when you have that belief, you have no um no reason to do anything about it. You just accept it. You just accept it and just accept it. You say, Well, uh, why do I do anything about it? I'm not gonna get better. Why do I waste money? Why do I waste energy? I'm not gonna get better. Uh it's it's like almost like a life sentence.

SPEAKER_00 46:05

It it is, and it's so easy to believe the lies you tell yourself about and it's easier to believe the lie. Also, I noticed this. I notice this, Dr. Hart, it's that people that have these issues, this is just say it is trauma, they're they don't want it to go away because who are they without it? They have no clue. I uh oh yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 46:29

Attachment to our pain, yeah. Oh my god, that's such a huge thing that um after being with that pain for 30, 40 years of your life, that is defining you. That becomes a part of your identity. Who am I gonna be without this pain, without all these stories? And um, some of my clients I work with, I just invite them to rewrite their story. I'm like, stop telling this story, it's not your story anymore. Just rewrite it, rewrite a new story and tell that new story and let go of this attachment to the pain you have. Right, because it's they haven't looked beyond it. They don't know anything after that. I mean, they haven't seen anything better. Say, like somebody like me who things started happening to her at age four. What do I remember about me between the time I was born and I was four? I don't remember a whole lot.

SPEAKER_00 47:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 47:29

So pretty much all my life I have lived with those stories. Yes. And um you just have to proactively and intentionally, with help of somebody, a mentor, a guide, a healer, whoever, start rewriting your story and um recognizing that you're not those old stories. You're not, you're way more than that. And you can be anybody you want to be. You can literally write a new story the way you want it to write it.

SPEAKER_00 48:02

I love that so much. That is beautiful. And our listeners need to hear that over and over. And also, I tell them we're never done. Uh we're still learning about ourselves. I always tell them the shoemaker has the worst-looking shoes. I am a web designer by trade. Don't go look at my website, people. You're saying it's hard for you to be a patient. Right. It's true. The shoemaker has the worst-looking shoes, and we're constantly learning and becoming. If you look at it as becoming, then it's not so difficult to accept. Do you agree with that?

SPEAKER_01 48:37

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00 48:38

For the person that's

Practical Encouragement And Where To Find Her

SPEAKER_00 48:40

listening right now, who is functioning and smiling and showing up for everyone else, carrying responsibilities, checking all the boxes and doing everything they're supposed to do, but they're quietly struggling inside. What would you like them to hear from you today?

SPEAKER_01 48:59

I sound like a broken record, but there is hope. Yes. There's absolutely hope. Uh, you're not defined by your old stories. You are way, way more powerful than you think you are. Don't let your depression or your old stories lie to you that you cannot. Yes, you can. You can do anything you put your mind onto it. And initially, you may need some help, but somebody like me, I do not want you to be dependent on me or any outside source. I truly believe in empowerment of each person. And I do that because I truly believe you have the power to be liberated and be on your own. And if you can't believe that about yourself, nothing can stop you.

SPEAKER_00 49:56

Nothing can stop you at all. Healing doesn't begin when everything's fixed. Healing begins when when we're willing to listen to someone like you. That knows personally that matters, that makes a difference. You're not just talking from some textbook. Yes, you're speaking from experience, and you know firsthand that you have to be willing to listen to someone. How can we find your work? Please tell our listeners how we can follow you and find you.

SPEAKER_01 50:23

They can go to my website. Uh, it's called Healing by Heart, and Heart is my last name, H A R T. And there they can find all kinds of information about MAP, about CAP, which is Kundilini activation process. They can find my social media, they can email me, they can schedule a 15-minute uh free consultation with me, they can reach me.

SPEAKER_00 50:49

Oh, I just love it. And don't worry, everyone, we're gonna put all of that in the show notes. And as always, pause, choose, build momentum, finish stronger, and remember your past does not define you, it prepares you. So until next time, y'all keep becoming, okay? Thank you so much, Dr. Hart. We appreciate you. See y'all next week.